I’m not one to force a decision I let things come naturally and I do what I feel is right for me but for now I’ve made the decision to stay single.
First of all this is my personal choice and not one I’m trying to influence on anyone because it works for me not necessarily everyone else. It’s okay to be single and its great being in a relationship, As a 22-year-old woman I think it’s important to highlight a few things; What I’ve learnt and what I’ve figured out in my perfect timing. I read that you 20’s are meant to be your ‘Selfish Years’ and to be honest I do feel selfish. A couple of years ago being selfish would’ve not been okay with me, I would say I’m the complete opposite…very very selfless in fact. However selfless am, I just NOW know when to think for myself and being selfish has never felt better.
I want to spend my time doing what I want when I want to do it, I’m not willing to negotiate my own time with someone on how it should be spent. Some days I don’t feel like doing anything and if I want to stay in bed I will but when you’re with someone you kinda have to dedicate your time to them so it only becomes partly your choice.
Other day’s I might fancy a spontaneous day and they might just want to stay in bed and I dont want to be a naggy girlfriend that gets her own way all of the time, No matter what anyone says you are partly restricted… it’s our time to do what we want, Am I right?
I’m Exploring and Exploring My Purpose
I am going travelling and I am focusing on my dreams, I’m doing it all for the experience and for alone time so I can figure things out. I’m not ‘finding myself’ I know who I am and I know what I want I’m just gathering inspiration for future business plans and getting together my 5 year plan. I want to be free to see the world, I want to challenge and test my own abilities to push myself to do the things that scare me and yes, I am scared but I’m getting a frill from it.
This one is very important, I often have waves of admiration for myself. I am extremely proud of my attitude, hard work ethic, passion and achievements so far but I find it very hard to accept my outer self, the way I look and the way I feel. It’s all well someone telling me I’m beautiful and saying I look good but I don’t see it or feel it. I can’t let someone love me when I don’t 100% love myself, I’m still to find this within myself and until then I ain’t going to be ready to give myself to someone even if they can tell me sweet nothings about myself everyday.
When I get to the point where I feel like I can look at myself and be like girrrrl you like bloody HOT, I’ll take it – Sign me up.
I want to take every opportunity that’s given to me without worrying about another person or without having to confirm with them if it’s okay to do so. I mean if someone offers me the opportunity to go to New York to work then how could I expect my + 1 (partner) to pick up their life and move with me? Like I recently said no matter how supportive someone is of you being committed to another person still restricts you from doing certain things, I have a strong vision for what’s to come in terms of my career and personal plans, I just want to give everything my 100%.
Get My Shit Together
I don’t want anyone saying I wouldn’t have what I have if it wasn’t for them, I need to stand on my own two feet and achieve my own things and create my own life before sharing it with someone… I know most people will say, ‘ no it’s nice to grow together and succeed’ which is fine.. If I do find myself getting in a relationship then there’s nothing more I’d want than to support someone like they’d support me but I think you can get quite dependent on someone no matter how independent you are… you’ll find them doing loads of things for you, maybe little but they’re he most effective.
I promise myself to get a few things in place first, whether that would be my business plan, savings, a home and even confidence
I was a little unsure if I should post this in case I found myself in a relationship sooner rather than later and would look a little silly but this is me, currently in the moment.
I’m not and haven’t even been dating, I’m literally that single girl that communicates as though she’s in a relationship, I forget to text and I get bored of speaking to people extremely easy and I don’t feel as though there’s any reason to small talk over a consecutive amount time when there’s nothing coming from it.
I hope you’ve enjoyed the read, I’m interested in knowing your thoughts… can you relate, do you agree? I’m open to have a conversation, leave a comment below.
Much love to you all, Becky x
Other Reads you might like from other bloggers –
Celebrating Female Friendships – BethLouisex
Booking Your First Solo Trip – Montzxo
Welcome to the world of Casual Dating – Flashedbydt