A Letter to My Teenage Self

I swear I was 13 like 5 years ago but apparently it was 10, I remember being a shy girl that would be mortified if the music was up loud in the car, I didn’t want to go on bike rides with my dad because I was scared people laughed at me, I was wearing Maybelline Dream matte mousse foundation …on my lips as well as my face…  I had my hair scooped across my forehead as a fringe and thought it looked amazing, I wore pj’s out with my friends even when we went to Romford ice rink on Friday nights because we apparently thought that was cool and I loved eating bowls of pasta as a snack when I got home from school before dinner! I don’t know when or how but it all happens so quickly and before I knew it, I’m almost 23.

I’ve done SO much in the last 10 years but so much to be proud of and so much to look back on and remember so it’s only important I write a letter to my 13 year old self today on my eldest niece’s 13th Birthday. I look at younger girls now and I can’t help but think they skipped an important stage of their life and that’s the embarrassing stage, everyone just seems so grown up, even from the make up they wear and the music they listen to. I wouldn’t ever want my younger darlings to grow up any more than they have to at their given age, I just want them to make most of every moment they have now and enjoy every second of it without worrying about little things, we are now in a generation that lives of social media and it’s not always a good perception for our younger generations. It’s important to share my advice and pass it on, Anyway here’s a letter to you.


You were my first opportunity to become and auntie and I remember holding you like a little dolly, little did I know you would grow up to be my bestfriend (so bloody quickly) that’s taller than me even if there is 10 years between us…I am proud of you and I could tell you this everyday… There’s a few things I would like you to know so I have listed 13 things to go with your 13th birth year.

I would like to wish you the happiest of birthdays & I would love to send you every little bit of luck and positive energy that I have to give you for yourself and everything that is to come.

Not everyone has to like you – Be yourself

You are always going to go through life wanting to be popular and have loads of friends, there’s nothing wrong with that at all but don’t be disheartened when you come across people you don’t get along with. You will always attract like minded people at different stages in your life, some will stay and some will go.

Listen to your Family

Everyone has your best interest at heart, I know listening to your parents is the last thing you want to do but believe me, they know best! (Including Aunties and Nan’s too)

It is also important to appreciate your family, I know I know… They’re annoying and all you want to do is scroll on Instagram and chat to your friends on facetime but if I could change one thing is to spend more quality time with my family and shut of the rest of the world, even to have a movie night or a walk in the park.

Don’t Change for Anyone but Yourself

Like #1 – Not everyone has to like you so don’t change the way you are just to fit in, unless you want to change things for yourself and yourself only then I wouldn’t even suggest doing it otherwise. Be your best self all of the time, you don’t owe yourself to anyone.

Have fun

& Don’t grow up too quickly, act your age. Enjoy every second of every moment, I worried too much about things I shouldn’t have when I was growing up, I have always considered myself 10x older than I actually am and that made things harder for me.

No matter if you’re at home or out with friends just make everything extra fun and smile loads. A smile is the prettiest thing a girl can wear

Don’t be a gossip, be everyone’s friend

Don’t gossip about other people it will often come back to bite you on the bum and people will pick up on it and wont tell you anything…Most importantly don’t ever mock another person. There will always be different types of people at school and they will be in different friendship groups, I always made sure I made an effort to be nice to everyone at school and having that friendly nature opened up my mind and allowed me to explore different personalities, I never cared what ‘group’ they were in.

Be Confident and Humble

Everyone will tell you that you’re smart, beautiful, amazing and talented so use that to your advantage. You are you and you’re amazing, you should always learn to be proud of yourself and carry confidence with you. You have to be a positive change in the world so spreading love and happiness and inspiration to others will bring a whole lot more recognition back to you. Don’t brag about things and show off, value everyone and everything around you and help them if they need help. Stay grounded but be an inspiration to other people (You have a little sister and a baby cousin looking up to you)

You Body will change and that is OK

You are now a teenager and as a female you will start going through all the unpleasant stages of growing up BUT it’s not a bad thing, it is exciting. You are just growing into a woman. You will start forming boobies (size doesn’t matter, I mean I still have little boobies and I love them) You will start getting little hairs (You do not need to get rid of them 99% of the time)  and you will start a period but that’s just life, Love it and embrace it, it’s a new milestone in your life.

It is important to be body confident, don’t ever look at anyone else and wish you looked like them – No matter what your size is or what features you have, from head to toe you are your own beauty, never let anyone let you think any different.

Make plans (Have goals) 

Okay, I know you’re only 13 but it is good to make plans for your future self, set little goals that you want to reach and start achieving them, It could literally be anything you want, Only you know what you want to achieve.

Being Clever is Cool

It’s nice being beautiful but even more amazing being clever, You spend so much time in education that it does become a drag BUT they are the best moments of your teenage life and ones that you will forever remember. Read loads and broaden your knowledge and imagination. Listen in class and do what the teacher says (because they also have your best interest at heart too) and don’t be afraid to help others if they need help with their work.

Do Not Slam Doors

If you’re emotional about something then speak to someone, If you’re angry then speak to someone… no matter how you feel I will always suggest speaking to someone…friends or family and maybe even your closest  it doesn’t matter. Don’t be angry for too long or try not to be too negative about a situation because you’re best to get it out in the open and we can all help you deal with whatever it is. FYI, slamming doors in a strop makes you feel really good but don’t tell mum I said that.

You Can say No

I did and still get ‘FOMO’ Fear of missing out… But it is okay to say no to friends, you don’t have to be everywhere all of the time especially if it means mummy or daddy having to pay for it but not being able to afford it.

If you don’t feel comfortable doing something then you don’t have to do that either. You certainly don’t have to talk to boys until you’re 23, Don’t ever let them tell you what to do even if they are cute! Last but not least don’t give into peer pressure, you know what’s right and wrong so just be smart.

Do All The Things You Love 

If there’s something you think you you’ll be good at or you know you’ll be good at then pursue it. Sports, art, singing, dancing whatever it may be… there’s so many opportunities for you out there to do the things you love and I will always support that, it is good to follow your path even if it’s something you decide you don’t want to do after a while.

‘Teenage Girl Starter Pack’ 

I thought I would share with you the little starter pack I made up for my nieces 13th Birthday, I browsed online endlessly just because I wanted to make up a little something that would be suitable for her 13 year old self!

I thought I would start with the book ‘The Art of Being A Brilliant Teenager’ for obvious reasons I thought this would be a good focal point of the pack. From what I see when I flicked through it was light hearted and funny.


Secondly I opted for the ‘beauty bits’ all from Wilkinson’s – I got all of this (and a little extra) all for under £12 – Just handbag essentials for a teenage girls bag right? it is important to teach your teens of personal hygiene at this age as their activity levels increase.


I got a VUE cinema voucher for her as this is just what she currently likes to do, I told her to take a friend or 2 to her chosen film choice. Along side the largest popcorn bag and pot of sweets I ever did see! (They were also half price in Wilkinson’s, eh thank you!)


My favourite thing to do is send a card from Funky Pigeon – You simply can’t beat anything personalized, This is my favourite go-to as they’re always on time, within budget and always look as good as the preview.

I love that they save all of the names and addresses that you send cards to and remind you that it needs to be done!


I hope you’ve enjoyed the post and I hope you can take something from it, whether you’re a young teen yourself, if your a parent/aunt/sibling looking for some gift inspiration or a little advice to pass on to your young one.

Comment below and show some love, share with us your ideas for boys and girls and let me know what you’d like to see.

Stay connected & help me reach my next milestones here on my
Twitter : @beckyrosecarver
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16 thoughts on “A Letter to My Teenage Self

  1. Lovely reading, just took me back when you were all teenagers….brilliant Becks, I’m sure everyone will love this one as all the others xxx


  2. Oh my goodness! This is one of the sweetest posts I have read, so much love and passion behind it! Firstly the mouse foundation, oh girl we have all been there 🙈 I remember I use to use so much of that stuff and think it was bloody awesome! Would eat so much junk and just have fun! The tips are so true! I have a younger sister who turned 12 in January, she is growing up so fast and try and tell her to enjoy school and don’t wish time away.
    Great post, thank you for sharing! Your blog is beautiful. 💓xx

    Liked by 1 person

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