Genuine Attraction

I mean, you’re nice to look at but can you just stop talking?

Physical attraction Vs Mental attraction

This is something I knew I’d enjoy talking about, dating in our generation is just laughable but not always. I have a fair share of funny stories and I know many people who do to. I think we spend a lot of our time trying to be someone we’re not simply to impress someone we couldn’t bare to spend more than a night with anyway.

I speak for myself and everyone else when I say we all go for looks.  Don’t say I’m wrong because I know I’m not. Whilst being physically attracted to someone is key, it doesn’t define any individual and the way they look, beauty is in the eye of the beholder and if you don’t find a person attractive it just means someone else will, that’s just not your person.

I recently come across a post via Thought Catalog and ’13 guys on what physical attraction really means and whether or not it will make a person commit’

I was inspired to do my own research similarly to what had been done and get the thoughts of my followers. It’s an interesting topic as there is no right or wrong answer, everyone has different views, thoughts and opinions. I just like getting it out of you all!


What Is The Best Quality You Find In a Person When It Comes to Dating?

I’m quite fussy when it comes to guys, I get irritated very quickly and have a very low tolerance for things so one minute I might think they’re my dream guy then the next I’m repulsed by them… no joke.
My perfect person doesn’t exist but that’s fine because we can’t have everything we want, right? From physical attraction to mental attraction like their Characteristics, Practicality and personality what is it you like about a person? Here’s mine & yours (in text boxes)…


I like what I like, I don’t have a type (Accept from Antony Joshua) I just like what I like, I fancy loads of different people and they all look different. I like them to be presentable, into fitness (but not obsessively) and to have a little style. I don’t care if other people would find them attractive because after all, I am the one seeing them.

I have to be attracted to someone from the get go. I like someone who take’s care of themselves.

I have to be attracted to a girl, even just for sex. You know from dating someone how it will end up. I would want her to be active and have a well maintained body

I have to date someone who literally makes me tingle every time I look at him


Morals need to be in the right place, I can’t stand people that lie, even little white ones.. Just be honest about everything, If I wanted waffle I would go to the local dessert shop. They must be charming and must be respectful, don’t hold an attitude, you know the kind that would be rude to a waiter? NA not for me. Someone who is responsible and independent.

I like someone that is kind and quick-witted

Someone who is appreciative, That is priceless


I love smart people, it is hot. Girls that pretend to be stupid are bad enough but when it comes to guys doing it, it’s a massive turn off, there’s a fine line between being a little ditzy to being stupidly stupid. I want to be able to hold a solid educational conversation with them. Must be passionate (with me and his future goals) must be confident but not a dick…an amazing sense of humor & have a personable approach like me because I can’t have someone stand behind fiddling their thumbs me whilst I socialise with other people.

Someone that is comfortable in their own skin, someone that doesn’t try seek attention from 100’s of other people

Someone that makes me laugh is number 1, I don’t like them to take things too seriously but I like them to step up and act like a man when they need to.


A handy man, yes please! I don’t care if you work in an office you must be able to get out a tool kit and be prepared to fix things, he MUST be able to do simple tasks, don’t come at me when you don’t know how to operate a broken tv or not know how to sort out bills or letters from HMRC.
Cooking and cleaning skills are massively important, I like to eat and I like guys that like to eat. Must be aiming for job progression or their own business & have a successful outlook and last but not least, what everyone wants, someone that will give you a deserved seeing to in the bedroom.

My husband is very hard-working and I am so proud of him, I knew he would be like this from when we met, that’s why I liked him – Determination and work ethic is important as I am also passionate about my work.

My girlfriend is really romantic, she does little things for me that I noticed when we started dating and I loved that, she still does the little things now and I think that is important. I am romantic too (don’t tell anyone) but you need passion and intimacy I would always look for them attributes in a person


What makes you want to commit to a person enough to take it to the next level?

This was a bit open-ended on my behalf because when you know you just know (well at least you think you know at the time) I would say it’s when you’re overwhelmed with their company and you start thinking about them more often than not, when you start to miss them and start getting excited about being with them. that honey moon period does have a ticking time bomb, fortunately the bomb may go off and be filled with extreme joy and glitter but unfortunately it can be a real disastrous explosive and I shit you not it will go to shit.

Personality would be what take’s it to the next level for me, the best qualities in a person are generally categorised under personality so to me they’re most important.

Trusting someone is the biggest one for me, When you date someone that’s where the respect starts, If someone fucks about then instantly that is a no go but when they admire you from then on you just have to go with it.

If I can tolerate them for more than 3 months and haven’t found any annoying habits then I guess they’ve secured a spot to the next level

When no matter how busy they are they will take time to spend with you, time is the most precious gift. When they make you laugh even when they’ve irritated you, Mutual respect and of course trust.

When I feel utterly obsessed with them, Like I’m ready to show them off so I want to call them mine

After meeting their friends and family you can make a more solid judgment, it can’t be once either, you need to meet them in different environments and on different occasions, you can tell a lot about a person by the people they are surrounded by.

Their commitment throughout the dating phase

I love the ‘seeing’ stage of a relationship, I love it when a persons generosity starts to show and they are romantic and morally respectful, I love when they start naturally including you in plans, that’s when I know.

Personality all day everyday, go for looks and you’ll just get sex

When they have the same life goals, make time but not too clingy, don’t want to rush into anything, caring and good at communicating. Having a friendship as well as a relationship.



What I found during my research was that physical attraction was just a primary thing, standard. It guess what I said about ‘ beauty being in the eye of the beholder’ is true. Who really JUST goes for the looks and will looks get you anywhere further than just the first stages of dating? na uh.

Whilst it makes us feel good-looking good, focus on your energy and your key attributes. Make sure you highlight all of the good things about yourself and don’t worry too much about what you think something thinks about your appearance because if they don’t accept you for you, they’re wrong for you already. Self love and the rest follows.


What is your favourite attribute and what makes you commit to a person? Please leave your love and comments below

I hope you enjoyed the read, I’ve loved having you!

 Twitter : @beckyrosecarver
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6 thoughts on “Genuine Attraction

  1. Ok. so I think you’re my soul mate… We literally have the same type of preference in a guy but I don’t think he exists either haha, I rush things too quickly and I think I get caught up with the little pointless things (like looks) and it ends up being a bad decision

    This was another brilliant read Becky, You’re getting better and better and I love seeing you grow, you deserve all of what is to come with your future x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Omg this is the sweetest! Thank you (SHOW YOURSELF haha)

      I’m glad you enjoyed the read and please do keep following, I love having an impact.

      I know it happens and we cant help ourselves, I’m glad we have the same preferences too – i thought I sounded fussy but I don’t think it is at all.. haha xx


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